17 November 2007
John 4:10
FV3
10 Jesus answered and said to her, “If you knew the gift of God, and who it is who says to you, ‘Give Me a drink,’ you would have asked Him, and He would have given you living water.”
I like this verse because all I need to do is to ask You, and You will give me living water. Nothing else can quench my thirst and can satisfy my desires but You alone. And when I ask, You will give- that is Your promise to me. I need it badly- I need Your living water because I am thirsty, just like this Samaritan woman. I can identify with her- I feel for her. She has had five husbands. If I was her, I wouldn't know what to do with my life anymore. She didn't have five boyfriends- but five husbands. How bad is that? I thought I was bad..
You knew she was coming- that's why You sat at that well and asked her for a drink. You knew her desires. You knew she wanted something so bad. She really needed You, Lord. She was looking for something that man couldn't give her. She's tried so many until she just decided to give up on marrying them altogether. What is it she is looking for, God? I feel so much like her right now.. I've had three boyfriends, and the one I am with right now is not even my boyfriend. What is it I am looking for, Lord? Please tell me.
Whatever it is, I just pray that You give it to me- because what this world has to offer, can never quench this thirst of mine- be it boyfriends or husbands, they cannot quench it- only You can. I don't want to spend my entire life like this woman- lost, looking for something she can never find because she is looking at the wrong place. I know where to find You- You're right here.
Lord, I give up- I lay my cards down. Whatever it is I'm looking for, just give it to me. I am asking You right now, Lord. I give up trying to find my own way. I admit that I can never find it my way. I give up. My way is just wrong. It's just not the way. It's not going to get me anywhere. Whatever it is I'm looking for- just give it to me! You promised You'll give it to me- You said it in this verse, and You never break Your promise. So give it to me.. I don't even know what I'm asking for.. but You know. You call it living water- so give me this living water. I know living water is just a metaphor, because she happened to be drawing from a well. So, I don't know what it is called. But it doesn't matter- I want it.
Wait- I know what she was looking for- You are that living water, aren't You? She asked, "Sir, give me that living water." And You never break Your promise- so that means that You did give it to her. And the point where she left her waterpot was just after she asked You for the Messiah, and You said that it was You, then she left. That means, she was actually looking for the Messiah- You, and she found You, and she was overjoyed!
I'm looking for You, Lord.. I want You, and I'm asking for You. So please, come into my life, and be with me. I need You, desperately.
Mental Picture:
This little girl was asking her dad a question, and she had big eyes and looked so cute and innocent. She seriously wanted to know and she asked him gently and sweetly as she looked up to him with her tilted head. She was holding his little finger, strolling round the park with him. He wore this white shirt and black pants, like he was on his lunch break, but took time off to see her, just taking an aimless walk around the park, spending time with her- doing nothing. I was so touched by her dad- he was a busy man, but somehow, she seemed more important to him. I just don't understand why he took time off to answer simple questions, which seemed to bewilder her. Simple questions about common things that happen daily, which no one bothered about. And he answered her, as detailed and as slowly as he could, so that she understood. He spoke softly and gently back to her, as though it was an important question and he wanted to make sure she caught everything he said and treasured every sentence.
Application:
I want a dad like that- a dad that i can just hold his little finger and walk around the park aimlessly. A dad who thinks I am the most important person in the world- more important than his work. The little girl was probably asking, among all the other questions- why he actually took time off to see her that day. And his answer was probably spoken to her gently, softly, slowly and as detailed as he could, so that she understood every single sentence.
I'm asking You.
* tRUST & OBey the LORD *
Showing posts with label devotions. Show all posts
Showing posts with label devotions. Show all posts
Saturday, November 17, 2007
Tuesday, October 16, 2007
I need You
Psalms 28:8
8 The LORD is their strength,
And He is the saving refuge of His anointed.
Strength. Yeah.. this is what I need right now.. although I know very well that I am not a failure and all.. it's like.. after the fight.. I won but I'm still wounded.. aihh.. wounded soldier.. I need You, Lord.. I need You to give me strength.. no.. most of all.. I need You to be my strength. I rely on You alone.. this life is not mine.. I don't want to live it anymore. I want You to be the one living in me. I want You to be the strength which carries both these spiritual and physical bodies through. I need You.. You are my strength. I have nothing left.. without You, I am nothing. How can I go through this life alone? How can I go through this life at all... if I don't have You? There is nothing for me here.. there is no strength left in me.. I cannot get a degree without You as my strength. I would completely fail everything if I didn't have You. Because I don't have what it takes. I have nothing and I am nothing. But You.. You have everything and is everything. How can I live without You?
I need You, Lord.. please don't leave me. You are my only hope. You are the only one who can help me. I desperately need You. Please be with me.. I am nothing, and that's why I need You. Without You, I am like that worm in little mermaid.. that seaweed people.. under the curse.. helpless.. no purpose, no use.. not even valuable in terms of looks.. totally useless.. in fact, it takes up space.. and the sight of it makes me feel like throwing up.. that's who I am without You.. until You come and rescue me.. and make me something.. make me the person I am meant to be.. yeah.. that's my mental picture.. You are that powerful Saviour who grabbed the long thing and turn me back into the person You made me to be.. redeem me from this evil curse.. from a useless, space wasting creature.. to Your child. Thank You, Jesus.. Thank You for being my strength.. thank You for being my hope.. and thank You for being my salvation.. now that I am weak.. as weak as I am always.. You are backing me up.. You are the stick that holds up that creeper plant, which is me.. I love You, Jesus.. Thank You so much.. I need You..
* tRUST & OBey the LORD *
8 The LORD is their strength,
And He is the saving refuge of His anointed.
Strength. Yeah.. this is what I need right now.. although I know very well that I am not a failure and all.. it's like.. after the fight.. I won but I'm still wounded.. aihh.. wounded soldier.. I need You, Lord.. I need You to give me strength.. no.. most of all.. I need You to be my strength. I rely on You alone.. this life is not mine.. I don't want to live it anymore. I want You to be the one living in me. I want You to be the strength which carries both these spiritual and physical bodies through. I need You.. You are my strength. I have nothing left.. without You, I am nothing. How can I go through this life alone? How can I go through this life at all... if I don't have You? There is nothing for me here.. there is no strength left in me.. I cannot get a degree without You as my strength. I would completely fail everything if I didn't have You. Because I don't have what it takes. I have nothing and I am nothing. But You.. You have everything and is everything. How can I live without You?
I need You, Lord.. please don't leave me. You are my only hope. You are the only one who can help me. I desperately need You. Please be with me.. I am nothing, and that's why I need You. Without You, I am like that worm in little mermaid.. that seaweed people.. under the curse.. helpless.. no purpose, no use.. not even valuable in terms of looks.. totally useless.. in fact, it takes up space.. and the sight of it makes me feel like throwing up.. that's who I am without You.. until You come and rescue me.. and make me something.. make me the person I am meant to be.. yeah.. that's my mental picture.. You are that powerful Saviour who grabbed the long thing and turn me back into the person You made me to be.. redeem me from this evil curse.. from a useless, space wasting creature.. to Your child. Thank You, Jesus.. Thank You for being my strength.. thank You for being my hope.. and thank You for being my salvation.. now that I am weak.. as weak as I am always.. You are backing me up.. You are the stick that holds up that creeper plant, which is me.. I love You, Jesus.. Thank You so much.. I need You..
* tRUST & OBey the LORD *
Monday, October 15, 2007
Slave of Failure
Genesis 15:14
14 And also the nation whom they serve I will judge; afterward they shall come out with great possessions.
I don't know why this verse strikes me.. I don't even know why this word strikes me. But it sure does. You know, I never thought that when the Children of Israel came out of Egypt that the possessions they plundered from the Egyptians were that great.. I knew it was a lot.. but I didn't know it was so much that You had to mention it to Abraham. I mean.. You were just talking about the important stuff when You summarized the future to him, why did You have to mention about the great possessions, unless they were really that great! For goodness sake,.. You didn't even mention about Moses- the chosen leader to lead them out of Egypt- not even a hint! And You didn't say.. "they shall come out with great miracles, signs and wonders".. instead You said.. "they shall come out with great possessions".. what the crap?
Abraham was already rich. And when it comes to talking to rich men about big money, they mean business. He was equivalent to Bill Gates in this time, and when you tell Bill Gates "great possessions" or "big money", it's not just millions we're talking about here, but billions of US dollars.
Imagine if I were to be given a chance to plunder Egypt! Imagine if I could withdraw as much cash as I wanted from the WorldBank without having to pay any interest or give anything back.. I would be richer than Bill Gates! Heck.. I would even be richer than some of the countries in this world, I guess.. I could probably 'buy over' this place.. if you know what I mean.. after all.. 'every head has a price'.. lol.. Just like IMF.. they have the money, and they can throw their weights around.. ok, why am I talking about this? Too much college..^^
Ok, I admit.. I was worried. I was so worried about my future that when I found out that I failed one of my subjects, I freaked out. I totally lost it.. I told myself.. how could I ever do anything for You? I saw myself as a total failure. True.. I AM a failure. But You are not.. So the Children of Israel were slaves.. like I am a slave of failure. But You redeemed them. And so You are redeeming me. You redeemed them and gave them so much more than they needed. So You also want to give me everything I need for Your purposes.
Slave of failure.... who would have ever thought of it? Help me!!!! The song 'More than Useless' kept bugging me since the morning after the day I failed. Aihh... fail fail fail... God help me.. I think about it every now and then.. It hurts me as though a guy just dumped me.. Heck.. I rather be dumped by my biggest crush than to fail any one of my subjects!!!! Crap.. After all,.. crushes are just crushes.. welcome to the real life, Anna~!
I wonder what it is like talking to the best straight A's student in the world about 'flying colours'.. I bet it's not just another line of A's.. I bet it's.. man.. I can't even imagine what could be better than that! Argh,.. since when did I have so much faith? I feel like condemning myself for the faith I have.. no, actually,.. I am not condemning myself for this faith but for this stupid laziness..
Would You? Would You do that for me? After all the times I failed You,.. in my relationships, in my spiritual life, in my studies.. I failed You over and over again.. I am a slave to failure, Lord.. would You forgive me? Would You redeem me? Would You? If I were You, I'd think I wouldn't.. slave of failure.. coming out with great possessions.. I still remember dad proclaiming the declaration yesterday before offering time.. "...bonuses! properties! good results in exams! unexpected gifts!" All these are considered.. 'great possessions' to a person like me.. and the words hit me hard.. 'good results in exams'.. 'good results in exams'.. 'good results in exams'... arghhhh!!! Want to hit myself on my head, but don't know where's the hammer.. ishhhh.. such a failure... such a failure!!!!
What la.. come and do devotion also condemn myself like mad.. FAIL~! See? Fail again.. ish ish.. do devotion also fail..aiyah.. forget it la.. everything also fail.. fail only lar! I fed up de.. want to cry now.. sigh.. fail my devotion.. I think the only thing good I am at is blogging.. how can You live with a person like me? How do You tolerate me? Patience. I guess patience comes from You.. aihhh.. see? Need so much patience with me.. Only You can have patience with me, lar.. no one else.. Lord.. whoever I get next time, ah.. please.. give him patience to tolerate me.. I suck.. I really do.. If only he can have the patience that You have.. then he can tolerate my failure also..
God,.. I really fail so much.. You sure You want to use me, ah? After I fail how? I want to cry de.. I so no confidence in myself.. no confidence.. aihh.. for Your own sake, la.. don't use me.. after You regret.. You sure You want to use me, ah? Don't regret wan ah? Don't after I fail already.. condemn.. but You don't condemn wan lar.. only the devil.. so I cannot let people condemn.. not even myself..
Aihh.. really want to cry de.. You trust me so much.. a failure like me.. trust me with great possessions.. seriously, I don't deserve to handle that kind of money, la.. My business studies so bad, how to handle money? I am beginning to lose my dreams of opening big businesses for You de.. beginning to lose hope in franchising hotels.. sigh.. my dream.. so many dreams la.. hotels is just one of it.. but when think of the finance.. I just lost hope, until You told me about the big money.. then only the dream start to come back.. I always wanted my own hotel, remember? Hehe.. double one hotel.. crazy me when I was a kid last time.. wanted to do everything.. bell boy, la.. room service, la.. house keeping.. You name it la.. I wanted it so bad.. You know, when You mentioned 'great possessions' and 'big money' to me, You know what was in my mind? (Yeah.. of course You know..) it wasn't just the school actually.. it was more on businesses.. Hotel industry.. I imagined a hotel in every major country that my church goes to.. a grand hotel, not any low cost air asia hotel.. a real one.. a nice one.. a magnificent one.. aihhh... dreams will be dreams.. now I feel like taking up H&T,.. after all, I have 40% in KDU.. but there's not where You're leading me.. arghh.. better catch my heart back.. it's running around playing football.. I don't even enjoy football..
Aiyah.. You purposely wan is it? Purposely let me fail, so I feel the pain.. sigh.. oklar.. whatever la.. fail fail, lor.. but as long as I am alive, I shall serve You and love You.. I will try harder this semester.. promise.. I won't fail You again..
* tRUST & OBey the LORD *
14 And also the nation whom they serve I will judge; afterward they shall come out with great possessions.
I don't know why this verse strikes me.. I don't even know why this word strikes me. But it sure does. You know, I never thought that when the Children of Israel came out of Egypt that the possessions they plundered from the Egyptians were that great.. I knew it was a lot.. but I didn't know it was so much that You had to mention it to Abraham. I mean.. You were just talking about the important stuff when You summarized the future to him, why did You have to mention about the great possessions, unless they were really that great! For goodness sake,.. You didn't even mention about Moses- the chosen leader to lead them out of Egypt- not even a hint! And You didn't say.. "they shall come out with great miracles, signs and wonders".. instead You said.. "they shall come out with great possessions".. what the crap?
Abraham was already rich. And when it comes to talking to rich men about big money, they mean business. He was equivalent to Bill Gates in this time, and when you tell Bill Gates "great possessions" or "big money", it's not just millions we're talking about here, but billions of US dollars.
Imagine if I were to be given a chance to plunder Egypt! Imagine if I could withdraw as much cash as I wanted from the WorldBank without having to pay any interest or give anything back.. I would be richer than Bill Gates! Heck.. I would even be richer than some of the countries in this world, I guess.. I could probably 'buy over' this place.. if you know what I mean.. after all.. 'every head has a price'.. lol.. Just like IMF.. they have the money, and they can throw their weights around.. ok, why am I talking about this? Too much college..^^
Ok, I admit.. I was worried. I was so worried about my future that when I found out that I failed one of my subjects, I freaked out. I totally lost it.. I told myself.. how could I ever do anything for You? I saw myself as a total failure. True.. I AM a failure. But You are not.. So the Children of Israel were slaves.. like I am a slave of failure. But You redeemed them. And so You are redeeming me. You redeemed them and gave them so much more than they needed. So You also want to give me everything I need for Your purposes.
Slave of failure.... who would have ever thought of it? Help me!!!! The song 'More than Useless' kept bugging me since the morning after the day I failed. Aihh... fail fail fail... God help me.. I think about it every now and then.. It hurts me as though a guy just dumped me.. Heck.. I rather be dumped by my biggest crush than to fail any one of my subjects!!!! Crap.. After all,.. crushes are just crushes.. welcome to the real life, Anna~!
I wonder what it is like talking to the best straight A's student in the world about 'flying colours'.. I bet it's not just another line of A's.. I bet it's.. man.. I can't even imagine what could be better than that! Argh,.. since when did I have so much faith? I feel like condemning myself for the faith I have.. no, actually,.. I am not condemning myself for this faith but for this stupid laziness..
Would You? Would You do that for me? After all the times I failed You,.. in my relationships, in my spiritual life, in my studies.. I failed You over and over again.. I am a slave to failure, Lord.. would You forgive me? Would You redeem me? Would You? If I were You, I'd think I wouldn't.. slave of failure.. coming out with great possessions.. I still remember dad proclaiming the declaration yesterday before offering time.. "...bonuses! properties! good results in exams! unexpected gifts!" All these are considered.. 'great possessions' to a person like me.. and the words hit me hard.. 'good results in exams'.. 'good results in exams'.. 'good results in exams'... arghhhh!!! Want to hit myself on my head, but don't know where's the hammer.. ishhhh.. such a failure... such a failure!!!!
What la.. come and do devotion also condemn myself like mad.. FAIL~! See? Fail again.. ish ish.. do devotion also fail..aiyah.. forget it la.. everything also fail.. fail only lar! I fed up de.. want to cry now.. sigh.. fail my devotion.. I think the only thing good I am at is blogging.. how can You live with a person like me? How do You tolerate me? Patience. I guess patience comes from You.. aihhh.. see? Need so much patience with me.. Only You can have patience with me, lar.. no one else.. Lord.. whoever I get next time, ah.. please.. give him patience to tolerate me.. I suck.. I really do.. If only he can have the patience that You have.. then he can tolerate my failure also..
God,.. I really fail so much.. You sure You want to use me, ah? After I fail how? I want to cry de.. I so no confidence in myself.. no confidence.. aihh.. for Your own sake, la.. don't use me.. after You regret.. You sure You want to use me, ah? Don't regret wan ah? Don't after I fail already.. condemn.. but You don't condemn wan lar.. only the devil.. so I cannot let people condemn.. not even myself..
Aihh.. really want to cry de.. You trust me so much.. a failure like me.. trust me with great possessions.. seriously, I don't deserve to handle that kind of money, la.. My business studies so bad, how to handle money? I am beginning to lose my dreams of opening big businesses for You de.. beginning to lose hope in franchising hotels.. sigh.. my dream.. so many dreams la.. hotels is just one of it.. but when think of the finance.. I just lost hope, until You told me about the big money.. then only the dream start to come back.. I always wanted my own hotel, remember? Hehe.. double one hotel.. crazy me when I was a kid last time.. wanted to do everything.. bell boy, la.. room service, la.. house keeping.. You name it la.. I wanted it so bad.. You know, when You mentioned 'great possessions' and 'big money' to me, You know what was in my mind? (Yeah.. of course You know..) it wasn't just the school actually.. it was more on businesses.. Hotel industry.. I imagined a hotel in every major country that my church goes to.. a grand hotel, not any low cost air asia hotel.. a real one.. a nice one.. a magnificent one.. aihhh... dreams will be dreams.. now I feel like taking up H&T,.. after all, I have 40% in KDU.. but there's not where You're leading me.. arghh.. better catch my heart back.. it's running around playing football.. I don't even enjoy football..
Aiyah.. You purposely wan is it? Purposely let me fail, so I feel the pain.. sigh.. oklar.. whatever la.. fail fail, lor.. but as long as I am alive, I shall serve You and love You.. I will try harder this semester.. promise.. I won't fail You again..
* tRUST & OBey the LORD *
Thursday, September 27, 2007
My sorrow overwhelms me
27 September 2007
Daniel 10
16 And suddenly, one having the likeness of the sons of men touched my lips; then I opened my mouth and spoke, saying to him who stood before me, “My lord, because of the vision my sorrows have overwhelmed me, and I have retained no strength. 17 For how can this servant of my lord talk with you, my lord? As for me, no strength remains in me now, nor is any breath left in me.” 18 Then again, the one having the likeness of a man touched me and strengthened me. 19 And he said, “O man greatly beloved, fear not! Peace be to you; be strong, yes, be strong!” So when he spoke to me I was strengthened, and said, “Let my lord speak, for you have strengthened me.”
Explanation:
When I thought about my friend that has a terrible sickness and not going to live forever, I can't help it but to be really sad. He is a really close friend of mine and the thought of going for his funeral soon.. I don't want to go for his funeral so soon. He is my friend. I don't want to loose a friend like him. Boyfriends can be replaced, but friends can't-at least I know this one can't. I was really sad and I told you how sad I was.. I said I needed You to help me because I am really sad right now.. and 'my sorrow overwhelms me'. If he dies, I'm really going to miss him- I'd cry like crazy. Now I wish I could spend more time with him. I wish I could do anything for him- take care of him as a friend. Good friends don't come easily, and I for one knows that very well. I appreciate friends like that.
Application:
You strengthen me, O Lord.. even when I am sad, Lord, You give me the strength to make it through somehow.
* tRUST & OBey the LORD *
Daniel 10
16 And suddenly, one having the likeness of the sons of men touched my lips; then I opened my mouth and spoke, saying to him who stood before me, “My lord, because of the vision my sorrows have overwhelmed me, and I have retained no strength. 17 For how can this servant of my lord talk with you, my lord? As for me, no strength remains in me now, nor is any breath left in me.” 18 Then again, the one having the likeness of a man touched me and strengthened me. 19 And he said, “O man greatly beloved, fear not! Peace be to you; be strong, yes, be strong!” So when he spoke to me I was strengthened, and said, “Let my lord speak, for you have strengthened me.”
Explanation:
When I thought about my friend that has a terrible sickness and not going to live forever, I can't help it but to be really sad. He is a really close friend of mine and the thought of going for his funeral soon.. I don't want to go for his funeral so soon. He is my friend. I don't want to loose a friend like him. Boyfriends can be replaced, but friends can't-at least I know this one can't. I was really sad and I told you how sad I was.. I said I needed You to help me because I am really sad right now.. and 'my sorrow overwhelms me'. If he dies, I'm really going to miss him- I'd cry like crazy. Now I wish I could spend more time with him. I wish I could do anything for him- take care of him as a friend. Good friends don't come easily, and I for one knows that very well. I appreciate friends like that.
Application:
You strengthen me, O Lord.. even when I am sad, Lord, You give me the strength to make it through somehow.
* tRUST & OBey the LORD *
Tuesday, August 28, 2007
Rejection can be your daily bread. If you're not secure in the call of God, you might not make it.
Mark 16:14
4 Later He appeared to the eleven as they sat at the table; and He rebuked their unbelief and hardness of heart, because they did not believe those who had seen Him after He had risen.
Explanation:
It's not easy to believe when people share testimonies of how good You have been to them in their lives. Or sometimes I just have a hardened heart as if their God is not the same God as mine, as if You will work miracles in their lives and not mine. But we worship the same God- how can I not see that? How is it so hard for me to believe in You? If You can do great things in people's lives, You can in mine.
Today I read the magazine about those women of God who were used by You to do great things- Cindy Jacobs, Barbara Wentroble, Barbara Yoder, Naomi Dowdy, Pat Francis and so many more.. just mentioning their names makes me kind of shiver.. How is it that their God is the same as mine? It's as if You are with them and not with me all of a sudden.. I think whatever faith I had before reading that proved to be nothing actually.. I can never imagine You working in my life in the same way You worked in theirs.
Or it's as if we had the same God but they were just extraordinary or something.. but then again I remember that it's not about us but it's about You. You like to choose people who are normal.. ordinary.. housewives... nobodies. Haha.. then again, I think that I am not 'nobody' enough to be used by You. Hahah.. not 'nobody' enough to be somebody. :P
Application:
So I guess I have to get rid of this unbelief and hardness of heart mentality.. I remember receive prophecy from Jim Hodges that You will use me in spiritual government and non-spiritual government... but even that is hard to believe, let alone the second one.. I want to vomit blood already.. summore he said, 'especially in the spiritual government'.. it's like.. what the.. I felt like asking him, 'Eh.. hear properly la.. don't simply say say..'.. but what he said is what he said.. then again I felt like telling myself, 'Hush, Anna.. it's just a small little part of a normal prophecy- why take it so seriously? Just forget about it la.. maybe he didn't mean it..' Aaah.. fighting within myself.. no idea what that guy is saying.. or maybe trying to avoid it.. trying to avoid being proud at the same time trying to avoid being disappointed and rejected. But then again, as I read the magazine, it talked a lot about rejections. Cindy Jacob actually said, "Rejection can be your daily bread. If you're not secure in the call of God, you might not make it." Now, come to think of it, my devotion only 2 days ago said something similar to 'secure in the call of God'. It said, '...make your call and election sure, for if you do these things you will never stumble'. Isn't it the same thing? -'if you're not secure in the call of God, you might not make it.' It's the same thing! Wow.. talk about God speaking.. I guess I have to be sure.. not just about building the school, but my calling to serve in church! Amen and Praise the Lord! So I have more than one calling..
---
26 August 2007
2 Peter 1:10
10 Therefore, brethren, be even more diligent to make your call and election sure, for if you do these things you will never stumble;
Explanation:
The things that were mentioned were faith, virtue, knowledge, self-control, perseverance, godliness, brotherly kindness and love. (vs.5-7)
5 But also for this very reason, giving all diligence, add to your faith virtue, to virtue knowledge, 6 to knowledge self-control, to self-control perseverance, to perseverance godliness, 7 to godliness brotherly kindness, and to brotherly kindness love.
If I did them, I will never stumble. That is why I have to make sure that my call and election is correct. I am sometimes confused about what I must do because I hear things in CNN news and all telling me other things. They said that we have to compromise. But I must be sure of my calling. I have to be strong. I cannot give in to it. I cannot compromise. I am going to kick the devil out whether he likes it or not because even if I want to compromise with him, he is not going to compromise with me. I'm going to take him by the tail. I am going to be diligent to make my call and election sure. The devil is very cunning- he tries to put words into the CNN to make me think to make peace with him, but who cares? He is the devil anyway! Am I going to listen to him? No! I cannot! I will not compromise- I am sure of my calling and my election!
* tRUST & OBey the LORD *
4 Later He appeared to the eleven as they sat at the table; and He rebuked their unbelief and hardness of heart, because they did not believe those who had seen Him after He had risen.
Explanation:
It's not easy to believe when people share testimonies of how good You have been to them in their lives. Or sometimes I just have a hardened heart as if their God is not the same God as mine, as if You will work miracles in their lives and not mine. But we worship the same God- how can I not see that? How is it so hard for me to believe in You? If You can do great things in people's lives, You can in mine.
Today I read the magazine about those women of God who were used by You to do great things- Cindy Jacobs, Barbara Wentroble, Barbara Yoder, Naomi Dowdy, Pat Francis and so many more.. just mentioning their names makes me kind of shiver.. How is it that their God is the same as mine? It's as if You are with them and not with me all of a sudden.. I think whatever faith I had before reading that proved to be nothing actually.. I can never imagine You working in my life in the same way You worked in theirs.
Or it's as if we had the same God but they were just extraordinary or something.. but then again I remember that it's not about us but it's about You. You like to choose people who are normal.. ordinary.. housewives... nobodies. Haha.. then again, I think that I am not 'nobody' enough to be used by You. Hahah.. not 'nobody' enough to be somebody. :P
Application:
So I guess I have to get rid of this unbelief and hardness of heart mentality.. I remember receive prophecy from Jim Hodges that You will use me in spiritual government and non-spiritual government... but even that is hard to believe, let alone the second one.. I want to vomit blood already.. summore he said, 'especially in the spiritual government'.. it's like.. what the.. I felt like asking him, 'Eh.. hear properly la.. don't simply say say..'.. but what he said is what he said.. then again I felt like telling myself, 'Hush, Anna.. it's just a small little part of a normal prophecy- why take it so seriously? Just forget about it la.. maybe he didn't mean it..' Aaah.. fighting within myself.. no idea what that guy is saying.. or maybe trying to avoid it.. trying to avoid being proud at the same time trying to avoid being disappointed and rejected. But then again, as I read the magazine, it talked a lot about rejections. Cindy Jacob actually said, "Rejection can be your daily bread. If you're not secure in the call of God, you might not make it." Now, come to think of it, my devotion only 2 days ago said something similar to 'secure in the call of God'. It said, '...make your call and election sure, for if you do these things you will never stumble'. Isn't it the same thing? -'if you're not secure in the call of God, you might not make it.' It's the same thing! Wow.. talk about God speaking.. I guess I have to be sure.. not just about building the school, but my calling to serve in church! Amen and Praise the Lord! So I have more than one calling..
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26 August 2007
2 Peter 1:10
10 Therefore, brethren, be even more diligent to make your call and election sure, for if you do these things you will never stumble;
Explanation:
The things that were mentioned were faith, virtue, knowledge, self-control, perseverance, godliness, brotherly kindness and love. (vs.5-7)
5 But also for this very reason, giving all diligence, add to your faith virtue, to virtue knowledge, 6 to knowledge self-control, to self-control perseverance, to perseverance godliness, 7 to godliness brotherly kindness, and to brotherly kindness love.
If I did them, I will never stumble. That is why I have to make sure that my call and election is correct. I am sometimes confused about what I must do because I hear things in CNN news and all telling me other things. They said that we have to compromise. But I must be sure of my calling. I have to be strong. I cannot give in to it. I cannot compromise. I am going to kick the devil out whether he likes it or not because even if I want to compromise with him, he is not going to compromise with me. I'm going to take him by the tail. I am going to be diligent to make my call and election sure. The devil is very cunning- he tries to put words into the CNN to make me think to make peace with him, but who cares? He is the devil anyway! Am I going to listen to him? No! I cannot! I will not compromise- I am sure of my calling and my election!
* tRUST & OBey the LORD *
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