It's the end of the world.. oh.. so?

I composed a song this morning^^ ahha.. yea.. after a long time..

mind you.. not a poem.. a song! =)

When the waters are raging,
I'll take you there;
When there's a deep longing feeling,
That none can compare;
When the wind's always blowing,
and no one seems to care;
When the distance seems growing...
I'll.. be there.

I'll be there, when the lions are roaring,
when the people are shouting, when the desert's a drought.
I'll be there, when the chains have been broken,
My Word has been spoken: I'll be there.

So guess what's the title of the song.. yep! You guessed.. "I'll be there" =D

Yesterday, I went for life group and it was about seeking You first and not worrying about this life. It's hard not to worry. Especially when I have 'big' things to worry about. Then I remember one guy: he said that he heard from a preacher before that our time on earth is really short compared to the time we will spend in Heaven. The time we will spend in heaven is eternity. So our life on earth is nothing, really. What is there to worry about? What is this life compared to eternity?

That really stroke a chord in me. I suddenly realized that it's not important. Nothing is important. Nothing but You. So what if I don't make it in life? So what if I 'screwed up' my life in the eyes of the world? So what if I don't make it in my studies? So what if I don't get a job? So what if I don't have bread to eat? So what if I die tomorrow? It's not that I don't want to live and don't want to study, but it's about what is worth worrying about. If I don't get to continue my studies, so what? It means that it is not God's will for me. Simple as that. But if I continue my studies then Hallelujah! So be it! So what if I have to go back to Malaysia for another year? So what if I don't ever come back to Australia at all? So what if I settle in Malaysia? So what? So what if it is the end of the world? You still remain, seated on the throne, higher than the heavens, and Lord of all creation. You can just destroy the whole earth and create another one. What is this world to You? What is life? It is even a vapor that appears for a little time, and then vanishes away. Instead, I ought to say, if the Lord wills, I shall live and do this or that.

Then what is life all about? Life is all about seeking Your face. It's all about spending time with You. It's all about pleasing You, obeying You, doing Your will, making You happy, knowing You, loving You and serving You. It's all about You. Everything else is comparable to 'bogus'.

* tRUST & OBey the LORD *

My top 10s

Recently, Jie and Caleb asked me to hand in my prophecy. I realized that 85% of that particular prophecy had to do with counseling people. And I remember that I was telling Jie that I could never understand why all my prophecies are always the same. They always have to do with advising people and counseling people. And they said I do it the non-traditional way. I could never understand. Jie said maybe it's because I haven't done anything about it yet, so it keeps coming..

But I know that I want to build the school so that I can help them. I still can remember Elijah talking to me about troubled kids. And I told him that I have a heart for troubled kids more than normal kids. And so he said, if I was given a bunch of naughty kids, would I be pleased, and I said yes. Because I believe that they have a reason for their behaviour. I've always had a lot of patience, and I don't know why.

But I want to build the school not just for charity sake. It's more than that. It's more than just applying a 'hospital' concept. It's about getting them to fulfill their personal destiny for their lives. I believe that everyone has a personal destiny. And if they achieve it, they would be the best of the best in whatever that destiny was, because everyone is unique and everyone has a different destiny. And everyone was meant to be the best in whatever field they were in.

Okay, to cut the long story short.. I've also realized that whenever I started my degree programme, I have been bumping into people from all kinds of nationalities. From Chinese from China to Bangladeshis to Syrians to all kinds of nationalities that came to me for help. I didn't know what an 'Integration Aide' was at that time, but I guess I was something like that: just that I did it for free. They sent to me their assignments and their homework, and sometimes I just want to tell them to pack their bags and go home because I feel like giving up on them.

Most of them faced English as a difficulty. I know I may not be a top scorer, but I helped them because I could speak better English. Even now, believe it or not, when I assumed that my 'jobs' in Malaysia were over, here I am, doing my postgraduate and guess what? Helping people again. I guess I just can't help myself. I tend to find people who seem to need it the most. I don't know why all my friends seem to be people who can't speak proper English and just needs someone to explain the whole course to them from scratch.

And it's amazing, sometimes.. to see friendships grow from nothing to something just because I chose to take a little time off to help people. And those are the best parts about my degree programs: helping people. Because when I help them, I realize that I've learned so much and that I've enjoyed myself so thoroughly. And it was a piece of cake helping them, really. It was literally my pleasure. I just pray that one day I could earn money by doing that. I think I would have earned a whole lot of money by now.

There is this job, as an integration aide in college. Someone told me to apply for it. I wanted to do it for free in one of the secondary schools, but this Integration Aide told me that I am valuable and I should be paid. He said that I need to earn a living as well. So he told me to go to LaTrobe University and apply for it there. And I've been really praying about it. So later today, I'm going to apply for it. Pray for me ya? It's my dream job^^

one of it anyways..

want to know my other dream jobs?
LOL... you'd be surprised.. here's the list rated according to number. 1 being most wanted:

11. Errand girl?? (^^) don't ask ... feel like taking this off the list..
10. Integration Aide (my latest addition to the list!)
9. Housewife? lol
8. Make up Artist! ..you'd be surprised~ or not.. but you already are! =P
7. Patisserie chef: the one that does tedious detailed icing designs on cakes

6. Architect
5. Landscaper
4. Interior Designer: Victorian theme

3. Painter Artist.. but it doesn't bring in much money.. and wouldn't have the heart to sell anything anyway..
2. Christian book author.. I'd do it for free..
1. Pastor!! (you guessed.. freeeee)

Hey.. noticed I could start a company to design the house, landscape the garden and even do the interior design of the house? LOL!!! And I would be interested in all 3!!!

Or.. I could also be a pastor, a christian book author and place my own paintings inside! How nice^^


The top 10 businesses I want to own:

1. Kinders to Tertiary campus ^^
   
   
2. Victorian Hotelsss
   
3. Victorian dresses boutique: fit for royalty ^^
4. Victorian interior designing company
5. Victorian interior furnishings company: wallpapers, curtains, sofa covers.. etc.
   
   
6. Children's furniture designing and manufacturing company
7. Bakery-restaurant selling all kinds of pastry, food and especially.. wedding cakes!
8. Lingeries designing and manufacturing company =P (really nice ones!)
9. Publishing company (sounds boring, no? i want to publish so many books!!!)
10. err............ international trading company? ...
    *yawn.. I guess I've changed.. I used to want this ~ don't know why.. for the money, I guess?

So.. that's a lil more about Anna! ahhaha.. what else you wanna know? Ah! How about the top 10 things that turn me off? LOL.. I'd keep that for next time..
till then, buhbyee~

annagrace

oklar oklar.. I'll tell you.. *tsk*

Top 10 things that turn me off:

1. guys that just want sex (and want it easy!)
2. ego guys
3. guys that are proud of getting wasted
4. complainers, whiners and the act of giving up easily
5. spoilt brats who want their way all the time
6. guys who try too hard to please you and has no backbone whatsoever
7. guys who expect you to 'mother' them and follow them everywhere until you don't have a life
   
8. a bad comment about my hair
9. hairy legs and arms.. apeness?
10. pretenciousness.... faking it/not keeping it real

yea.. that's about it.. or do you want 10 things that turn me on as well? Ahahah.. no need la..

buhbye~!

* tRUST & OBey the LORD *

tough choice

When it comes to crossroads like this, I have to choose. Sacrifices have to be made. And among all these sacrifices, I have to make You my priority because I have to know what is for keeps and what I have to forgo. I have to think through carefully. I have to remind myself that I have made You my priority and I cannot put others above You. Everything else just isn't so important. Everything else is just secondary. If anything else is opposed to what You want for me, then I have to forgo them.

Right now, I have to think carefully. What are my priorities? I have to list them down. Is getting PR more important or is finishing my masters as soon as possible more important? Is going to a reputable and prestigious university more important or is undergoing a course that is unique and has good teachers more important? Which is more important? Which is Your priority?

Honestly, I don't know anymore.

Why did I come to Australia? Is it really to get a PR or is it for my education? If I had the money; if money really wasn't an issue, I'd say I will continue my studies. This is why I am here. Even before Ebbie and Joey talked about flying to Australia and getting a PR here, I already talked about pursuing my masters. My coming to Australia to do my masters is my independent decision without knowing that Ebbie and Joey were going to Australia at all. It was just a coincidence. And if they hadn't decided to come to Australia, I would have gone ahead without them and pursued my studies in Queensland and wouldn't even be here in LaTrobe. It had nothing to do with getting a PR. Absolutely nothing whatsoever about getting a PR. The idea of getting a PR was purely Ebbie's misconception and influence based on her own desires and passion about getting a PR. She assumed I was in her position. It is not, however, a bad idea. Nevertheless, in terms of priorities, it comes second on my list.

Unfortunately, I don't have the means to pursue my first priority. Or so I think. Then there comes trust and obedience and faith and hope and all that. And in times like this, I cannot make decisions based on circumstances, but based on priorities and faith. Because if I let doubts sway my decisions then I shall be like a ship on the sea being tossed by the wind and people like that never accomplish anything in life, and let not a person like that assume that he shall receive anything from You. For what if they changed the law? Then after 10 months of working in Malaysia, I don't have the chance to get my PR? And then what? I wasted my 18 months there.

Secondly, the issue about studying in UQ or Latrobe is solely based on Your decision. If I use my logic, it tells me two things: the best in education is UQ - go for the best because God deserves the best. Then again, it says that it's not about the qualification or the grades - it's all about what I learn that is important. So what if UQ is the best if I've felt like I've learned so much in 1 semester here in LaTrobe - possibly more than I could ever learn in UQ in 2 years. I felt like my experience here in LaTrobe changed my life. It gave me opportunities of the unknown.

But then again, I felt like I've gained all that I could gain from LaTrobe and it is time to move on to the next thing, after all, I've never been to UQ and who knows? Maybe UQ is really better? I can't judge a University if I've never been there. Going to UQ will be able to give me the best of both worlds. I've gained all I could possibly gain from LaTrobe in one semester here and it has been such a rich experience. Staying back here another semester might result to me learning absolutely nothing and ending up in regret.

Priorities. Is money really a priority here? No it isn't. I can't let that depict my decision to stay in LaTrobe or move on to UQ. LaTrobe can only do so much for me. I believe I've soaked in their main essence as to what they believe education is all about. I've got the drift. I can't possibly learn any more from them that I haven't caught already. They've done their best, and I've soaked it all in. Time to get a new sponge. That's 50% of what I wanted to do. Now let's move on to the other 50%.

Money comes secondary to education and experience, so I believe I shall move on to UQ. I've let the money issue get the best out of me in deciding on my undergraduate degree and I've made the most out of the money issue there. I've graduated with my money's worth, all right. It was a hopeless education but rich experience that changed my life simply because You were merciful to provide me with a supportive Christian Fellowship who made it all worthwhile.

Question is.. how rich will my experience be in UQ? Only You know...

* tRUST & OBey the LORD *

Earth Vs Mars

What's the good of transforming Mars into a livable planet if it will merely remain an imitation of the Earth? And no matter how they try to imitate, Mars will never have the tropical rain-forests that have existed for millenniums, nor the great canyons, the waterfalls, the rivers or even mountains as high as Mount Everest. Or can it produce an ocean with sea creatures that reaches to such great depths, with life we ourselves have not came in contact with? No matter how great the technology of man is, this replica will never be as good as the original, much less better. The most we could do for our technology is to create clones - the act of replicating and mutating.

Will we ever be able to come up with something that is original? A creation of it's own kind - a living organism, an original life-form - without the replicated genes of another being? No. We did not create ourselves or any other creature in existence. Neither can we turn an original planet into something more original than it already is. We are imitators and inventors, not creators.

Mars has nothing as good as any destination on earth itself. The plains of Africa has more hope for any of us than Mars or the moon is. All the technology we have came up with today - why don't use it to turn deserts into a tropical rain-forest or maximize the seas worth of land? The earth has more than enough space for all of us, if only we know how to claim and use it. Why give up on something so valuable and authentic to spend all our efforts on a planet of barrenness and lifelessness?

When God first created humankind, His mission to Adam and Eve were "dominate the earth, subdue it" Did God ever commanded us to 'dominate the heavens' as well? No. He said earth. Take care of the earth. Don't give up on it. Put in everything you've got. Because no planet out there can replace the earth you already have.

^28 Then God blessed them, and God said to them, “Be fruitful and multiply; fill the earth and subdue it; have dominion over the fish of the sea, over the birds of the air, and over every living thing that moves on the earth.”
^29 And God said, “See, I have given you every herb that yields seed which is on the face of all the earth, and every tree whose fruit yields seed; to you it shall be for food. ^30 Also, to every beast of the earth, to every bird of the air, and to everything that creeps on the earth, in which there is life, I have given every green herb for food”; and it was so. ^31 Then God saw everything that He had made, and indeed it was very good. So the evening and the morning were the sixth day.

New King James Version Gen 1:28-2

¹ And God blessed Noah and his sons, and said unto them, Be fruitful, and multiply, and replenish the earth. ² And the fear of you and the dread of you shall be upon every beast of the earth, and upon every fowl of the air, upon all that moveth upon the earth, and upon all the fishes of the sea; into your hand are they delivered. ³ Every moving thing that liveth shall be meat for you; even as the green herb have I given you all things.

King James Version Gen 9:1-3

The earth is so precious to God, that He even made a covenant, not just with us, but also with all the creatures on the earth and the earth in itself:

⁸ And God spake unto Noah, and to his sons with him, saying, ⁹ And I, behold, I establish my covenant with you, and with your seed after you; ¹⁰ And with every living creature that is with you, of the fowl, of the cattle, and of every beast of the earth with you; from all that go out of the ark, to every beast of the earth. ¹¹ And I will establish my covenant with you; neither shall all flesh be cut off any more by the waters of a flood; neither shall there any more be a flood to destroy the earth. ¹² And God said, This is the token of the covenant which I make between me and you and every living creature that is with you, for perpetual generations: ¹³ I do set my bow in the cloud, and it shall be for a token of a covenant between me and the earth. ¹⁴ And it shall come to pass, when I bring a cloud over the earth, that the bow shall be seen in the cloud: ¹⁵ And I will remember my covenant, which is between me and you and every living creature of all flesh; and the waters shall no more become a flood to destroy all flesh. ¹⁶ And the bow shall be in the cloud; and I will look upon it, that I may remember the everlasting covenant between God and every living creature of all flesh that is upon the earth. ¹⁷ And God said unto Noah, This is the token of the covenant, which I have established between me and all flesh that is upon the earth.

King James Version. Gen 9:8-17

Now, if the earth meant so much to God: the creator of the earth, that He made a covenant not to destroy it by flood ever again, more so does the earth mean to us, the ones it was given to and given responsibility for.

In every human being, lies a heart for nature - it is undeniable. Children love animals. It is our natural instincts to care for the earth and the life it exhibits.

God made a promise not to destroy the earth by flood ever again, so don't worry about global warming which melts the arctics. That's not going to happen. We will either find a solution before that happens, or the earth will probably be destroyed before that happens or whatever, but a flood would certainly not happen again.

* tRUST & OBey the LORD *

Proverbs and taglines

These are quotes by God and me to God and so on.. unless stated otherwise..

do enjoy ^^

It's easy to obey You; if I don't think.

You are Heaven on earth

Worship goes beyond the words

Please grant me... Your wish

Thank You for being my Desire

God will always be my first priority, no matter who I am inside.

I live a life of sin, filled with repentance, covered in grace, showered in love.

It's not about skill, it's all about You

If I can't trust You, who can I trust?

You are: Beyond me

Bring me to the place where I am close to You - bring me to my knees.

Letting go of who I am and embracing who You are.

Thank You for impossible situations: they are miracles in the making.

I can't see what's beyond tomorrow, but Daddy, You can

Making it through and making You proud.

You make this world a better place

Draw the church nearer to the cross

When you put your feelings aside, your decisions are very different - opposites, in fact

Someone had to suffer for my sins and it wasn't me

Your love is enough, what can I ever desire?

Whether I forget the past or not does not mean that I'm moving on into the future. I need to move on despite the fact whether I forget the past or not. And moving on doesn't mean I've let go.

I rather not get married than to get married to someone who doesn't love me enough

Nothing you do can stop jealousy

He uses his heart to make me happy, not his head.

It's time to be a man and stop living for yesterday - Carrie Underwood

You love me more than he did because you could bring out a part in me that he couldn't.

Consistency - remaining the same when all else changes

Doing right the things I've done wrong

Why do we remember the goodbyes more than the welcome homes?

Dreams are what makes us human. The lack of dreams, however, make us do crazy things - like sitting down in the office from 9 to 5, 5.5/7 days of our lives.

Creativity is the catalyst for all music. Without creativity, music is noise.

Perfection is derived from more than just the failure to find fault

The more civilized we get in terms of techonology, the more uncivilized we become in terms of humanity.

* tRUST & OBey the LORD *