My heart's desire

I didn't appreciate my stay here in Australia
...until my visa was put on hold

Just when I found
the 'perfect' course to study,
the 'perfect' units in that course outline, and
the 'perfect' lecturer...


The walk along the streets was solemnly silent. I really had to go to the bathroom on the way home from the immigration office, but that was as fast as my legs could take me. As I looked along that memory lane, I started to realize that two months here in Australia really did make a difference in my life. I noticed the shops which brought back a nostalgic feeling of the time when my mom was around to buy stuff for us. I would sigh to myself but only within my heart.

I didn't appreciate my stay here in Australia until my visa was put on hold. It was that moment in time when I had so much to express but no words left to say. It was that time when I was sad but helpless at the same time. Disappointment at this point, was an understatement.

Just when I found the 'perfect' course to study, the 'perfect' units in that course outline, the 'perfect' lecturer - Peta Heywood. Sigh I would, but only to myself. Because I couldn't be bothered whether others heard that sigh or not. I was sad, but that's all I knew at that point, and I really couldn't process anything beyond that.

If I went back to Malaysia, it just wouldn't be the same. I wouldn't get a course like that, a school like that, much less a lecturer like that. The uniqueness of the course has actually got me attached to the school, to the course and to the lecturer. Simply because of one belief.

The faculty of education in LaTrobe has a unique belief and a collective belief at that, that education is meant to be exciting, interesting, motivating and loving. Full of passion, full of life. And I hold a similar belief. I have always had this belief ever since I was 7. Education was not meant to be boring, an obligation, compulsory,.. a nightmare.

The words of the immigration officer kept echoing into my head, 28 days 28 days 28 days 28 days... I was supposed to get back to the immigration office within 28 days,.. but I took two months. That was the complication. "No documents or anything else can be used to help you anymore. Now, you've just got to wait for me and the conciliation committee to decide whether to remove that complication from your statement or not." She said that thrice.

I was trying my best to hold back the tears as I kept my documents scattered on the table. It was embarrassing. Embarrassing that I had something I unconsciously allowed my heart to cherish. Embarrassed and surprised. Surprised as I finally came to realize how much this visa actually meant to me. Something new to comprehend.

I only kept asking one question, "How am I going to study about the 're-ignition' of education if I don't study in LaTrobe?" This is my heart's desire. Now I realize how desperate I am for it. Now I realize that LaTrobe is the only place I can get this. This lecturer, this belief, but much more so the aggression of such belief. The belief was only the root of something thriving.

Let it's branch grow. And let it reach the nations. Let it one day reach Malaysia, Philippines, Thailand, Vietnam, India, China. This is my heart's desire. Bring it across the nations. Plant it's seed, and let the tree grow. Nurture it, water it, fertilize it. Only let it grow wild. Let it's passion re-ignite every dead education system planted in those lands. Let every dry tree catch on fire. Never-ending, wild and ferocious.

I'm speaking from the heart of education, where passion resides. If there be any left.


Don't stop me.



* tRUST & OBey the LORD *